As another year rolls around it’s very likely that there are some goals you want to achieve or habits you want to implement. We all want to be better, it’s human nature to want to strive for more. But why is it that by the time February arrives approximately 80% of people have given up on their new year’s resolution? We can probably all relate to the feeling of a new year, new me vibe, or a fresh start, so let’s dive into some of that tactics I use in my own life to make positive changes more achievable and enjoyable.
Firstly, it’s important to understand WHY you want to achieve something or implement a new habit. It was Nietzsche who said, he who has a why can bear almost any how. A lot of us want to do things because we believe it’s what we should be doing or because it is a good idea. But this type of thinking is based around an external expectation that we should behave in a particular manner. I hate to break it to you, but society couldn’t care less about the habits you cultivate or the milestones you reach in your journey. This is why we need to have our own deeply rooted motivation. Our own personal why.
Why do we really want to do this or that? Why do we really want to achieve these particular goals? Why do you want to eat better? Why do you want to exercise more? To achieve anything in life we have to be motivated, and no motivation is more powerful than one’s own deeper meaning for something. An example of one of my why’s is the reasons that exercise at least 5x per week is non-negotiable for me. I’m less interested in how it makes my body look, but more so the fact that as I grow older, I want my body to stay in peak condition so that I can play and enjoy sports/games with my friends, future children and even grandchildren. As a practicing chiropractor I also require a strong & functional body in order to help the people I see, without that I’m no good to them and I can’t fulfill my core value of helping those in need. So, what is your deeper why? Find it, attach it to what you want to achieve, and nothing will stop you.
Next let’s look at the goal itself. Now this may seem counter intuitive but the goal you set for yourself is not nearly as important as the means to get there. Many of us set big, audacious goals but lack the proper planning and execution on how to get there. A goal is simply a milestone. A target to aim for. The real changes and improvements come from the habits that are required to achieve the goals. A great strategy for this is to write the goal, but to also write 3 actionable steps/habits to implement that will help you achieve that. Without these steps you are essentially aiming for a goal and hoping you achieve it with your old habits/routines, and if that was going to be effective you likely wouldn’t have that particular goal in the first place. You will always fall to the level of your habits/systems. A strong set of actionable habits will help you achieve any goal. Remember the goal is just a checkpoint to see if you are on track to fulfilling your why.
When setting goals/intentions it’s important that we make them realistic, achievable and we manage our own bandwidth effectively. By managing bandwidth, I mean rather than setting out to do a bunch of things, try focusing on just a few things at a time to make it easier for yourself to achieve. The harder it is for you to achieve, the more likely you are to fail and potentially give up. If goal setting is new for you, set a goal that you’re almost certain you can achieve to get the ball rolling. Then gradually increase the difficulty over time. It can also be effective to set short, medium & long-term goals. This way we can check in on our progress more regularly and get an idea if we are on track, or if we need to re-evaluate and modify our goals a bit. This could look like having a 3-month goal, 6-month, 1 year and even 5-10-year goals (these will change the most over time). I like to check in on my progress every quarter and see if what I’m working towards is still achievable as well as if it is still in alignment with my deeper why.
A goal must also be measurable. Without any means of quantification how will you know you’ve achieved what you set out to do? Many of you may set the goal to “work out more” or “eat better”, but what does that even mean? Without a metric of say working out 20 of 30 days in the month etc. how can you know if you’re on track or if you need to re-evaluate? Always set a measurable target to monitor progress. To follow on from making a resolution achievable, avoid making one that you’re likely going to break. This is essentially training yourself to break your own trust, and if you can’t trust yourself, how can you expect to follow through on anything you set out to do in the future?
Don’t rely on self-control or discipline. When put into a tempting situation to fudge on your resolutions, more often than not you will cave. So, to avoid this, try to structure your life and your environment in a way that temptation is minimized, so relying on self-control isn’t necessary. You can also utilize the power of momentum to help keep you on track. A powerful trick is to track how many days/times in a row you’ve kept your habit going, and the longer that streak builds up the harder it will be for you to go back to old habits. Recently after wanting to make a habit of meditation every day, made it 108 days straight without missing a session. That streak has since been broken (no problem with starting again and going one better though!), but there were many days when I didn’t feel like following through with it, but the fact that I had already come so far kept me going. So, keep track of how well you’re doing which will add extra motivation to sticking with it!
Lastly, it’s important to have fun with all this. Don’t beat yourself up if you miss a day of a habit or you break your resolution. Remember that it’s just a target to aim for to becoming a better you. And if you do break your intentions, just get right back on the horse and start again. Failures are only an opportunity for improvement. The trick is to not worry if you miss once, but never let yourself miss twice in a row, that just begins a habit of missing your good habits. Always keep your focus on the long-term gain, short term intensity is a sure-fire way to burn out and give up, set your sights on long term consistency. And remember you don’t have to wait till Monday, or next month, or god forbid next year before you start a good habit, goal, or resolution. There is no time like the present. Take the first step to growth and improvement now!
I hope this helps you crush your dreams for 2020! Remember to always do your best!
Peace & Love,
Ben.